Local lols

It isn't often that there is banter in WH local. Because by default, until someone speaks, the local list is always empty, such behavior can give away vital information about an operation. Only one person needs to speak and from that can be gleaned your corporation and how many people are in it, which in turn can give a potential fleet size, as well as kill-boards which in itself is a wealth of information.

So in the event we do engage in local chatter, it can get quite hilarious. As of late, just jumping into our neighboring systems to break things and ships hasn't been enough. Now we'll make entertainment out of it... sending one person in (and possibly cloakies) to pretend they are a lost newb, baiting residents to either think they have an easy kill, or think they are guiding someone out, while our fleet lays in wait.

One such operation happend just the other night, and the local chat had me in stitches.

Please note m oebius is our guy. Enjoy!


m oebius > Hi Kal, I'm just looking for a good site, came in from K
m oebius > I have to uncloak to drop my probes
Kal Zek > Ahh, well your buddy in the Pilgram needs his checked too
Kal Zek > Safe travels friend =)
m oebius > hmm, your confusing me but ok
Kal Zek > OH, The Pilgram isnt with you? Well then becareful, tehres a Pilgram on teh lose.
m oebius > Those are not very dangerous right
Kal Zek > Naw
m oebius > Ok, cool
Kal Zek > Pilgrams have just shoot blunderbusses
Kal Zek > very short range wep
m oebius > Ah
m oebius > You cleared all the anoms, makes it harder
Kal Zek > What cha looking for?
Kal Zek > maybe I can help
m oebius > some kinda combat site
Kal Zek > Well, there are a few next door, through teh null sec wh there
m oebius > Gotta find that hole
Kal Zek > Becareful, bad things happen there /shudders
Chakotae > invite me to fleet, ill give ya a warp to for that wormhole
Kal Zek > NOw why didnt I think of that
Kal Zek > You shame me Chakote =/
m oebius > no way, you guys will gank me
Chakotae > i swear i wont
Chakotae > im in a badger anyways
Kal Zek > Its true
Kal Zek > He's in a badger
m oebius > Oh cool, I found a combat site
Kal Zek > Yay
Kal Zek > Ya know, when you get those refunded SP's ina couple weeks. You might want to put some on scanning. it will help you find stuff faster. So im told
Kal Zek > I cant scan myself
Kal Zek > but i hear roumors
m oebius > Heh crazy.. refunds!?
m oebius > Why would they do that?
Kal Zek > I KNOW!
m oebius > These guys take awhile to kill
Kal Zek > Yeah, and thers no bounty, wtf is up with that?
m oebius > They have sweet loots
m oebius > I made about 100M last night
Kal Zek > cool
Kal Zek > Maybe that guy in teh Pilgram would makea truce with you, adn help ya out. Go faster then.
m oebius > I thought you said those were no good?
Kal Zek > short range
Kal Zek > You said tehy were no good
Kal Zek > lets see...
Kal Zek > Yeah, it was you...[07:24:18] m oebius Those are not very dangerous right
m oebius > omg you are like my girlfriend
Chakotae > lol
Kal Zek > She doesnt give you any either?
m oebius > now your being mean
Kal Zek > cause you aint getting any of this ass till I get a ring!
m oebius > cause now your like my mom
m oebius > you got pictures?
Kal Zek > sec, let me find it
m oebius > none of those virus pictures
Kal Zek > well, its cured now
Kal Zek > mostly...
Kal Zek > **link to a super gross pic**
m oebius > I've gotta alt-tab to see that one
Kal Zek > I'm gonna do you a favor
Kal Zek > Save you a nights sleep
Kal Zek > dont open that link =)
m oebius > I kinda figured
Kal Zek > Now see what a nice guy I am?
m oebius > Of course
m oebius > These battleships are taking me forever
Kal Zek > yeha, lil bitches, think they gonna live forever
m oebius > Did you buy a notcis yet?
Kal Zek > Naw
Kal Zek > they have a fat ass and move like my ex
m oebius > now I see why she is your ex
Kal Zek > it really was a fat ass, it wasnt the pants.
m oebius > sometimes I like that kinda thing
m oebius > I mean if we are being honest here
Kal Zek > well, if thats how ya roll
Kal Zek > haha, I said roll.....
m oebius > haha.. roll get it!
Kal Zek > hahahaha
Kal Zek > You better salvage those. Nyx gets pissed when people dont salvage.
m oebius > Why is Nyx?
m oebius > or who..
Kal Zek > Shes about 6'2", 275lbs
Kal Zek > face only a drunk could love
m oebius > thats your ex?
Kal Zek > no, she was 2'6"
m oebius > a midget! no way!
Kal Zek > way
m oebius > holy shit..
m oebius > I can't believe you gave that up
Kal Zek > I told her to wear vertical stripes. it made her ass look smaller, and she left me
m oebius > the ladies are sensitive, even the short ones
Kal Zek > Wouldnt even get me a sandwich on the way out.
Kal Zek > i was like WTF, fine, i'll make it myself
m oebius > what kind?
Kal Zek > egg salad
m oebius > ick
Kal Zek > oh, thats good stuff
m oebius > the egg salad is the most horrible sand. in the world
m oebius > you know what happens if you leave that out for an hour
Kal Zek > it hatches?
m oebius > for sure
m oebius > AFK for a bit, gotta bring in my salvager
Kal Zek > oky doky
m oebius > hard to chat and fly
Kal Zek > aint it
Kal Zek > they say talking on cellphone while driving is actually worse than driving after two beers.
m oebius > I've done both..
m oebius > at the same time
Kal Zek > Thats not good
m oebius > naw it was cool, I do it all the time

**At this point the trap was sprung**

Kal Zek > So, did ya get much isk from that?
m oebius > Looking good..
Kal Zek > Will it split very well with Heizeus, Memoocan, Loch Verus, Admiral Tomahawk, Asuri Kinnes, Lir O'Trog, Kwashi and Rafe Vatta? Nice Pilgram btw Rafe
m oebius > Your just looking at our kill board..
Kal Zek > resourceful fella, aint I? ;p
m oebius > Well, you lost the midget
Kal Zek > Poor Domi pilot, didnt know you was all laying in wait =)
m oebius > Well honestly, your POS defenses are pretty
Kal Zek > bah, she made crappy samiches anyhow =)
Kal Zek > I got a question, honest answer
m oebius > k
Kal Zek > Did you eff up teh landing when you ambushed my Badger, or was that on purpose to try and flush out some dumb brave soul trying to help me,
m oebius > You were already accelerating away from the station when I landed, and warped before I could get a lock
Kal Zek > ahh, was just lucky then
m oebius > Yhea
Kal Zek > thats two times today, lol

Eve Report Drama Llama

Fuck it. I am taking the troll bait.

The drama llama was unleashed on the Tweetfleet last night here.

Some follow up posts can be seen here, here and here.

For the most part, the responses sum it up very nicely. CK really has nothing to step down *from*, and in my opinion, if for some reason he decided to stop doing his thing all together it would be more damaging to the community than not.

But the huge bull in the room that the few people who agree with mysteryKhaaan miss is that the podcast CCP highlighted is not just CK's. There are four of us equally working on it. Myself, CK, Ardwulf and Memoocan.

Not to mention my name was also listed on that CCP newsletter... you know... the one that only showcases specific people all the time and never shares the love? The one that only showcases CK.... oh wait.

Following Khaaaans logic I should not have been listed, being a virtual unknown. But that point was conveniently forgotten.

And then I also wonder, who is this Khaaan person? Not gutsy enough to post his in-game name, or his blog after pitching a giant nerd-rage basically because he isn't getting enough attention. It makes me wonder if we haven't actually all just been trolled.

Grand Theft Moros

I logged on the other night to hear much gigglesnorting in voice coms.

"What are they up to?" I thought, as I tried to work out what exactly was the source of such wicked glee.

Apparently they found a wormhole that had a station caught quite literally with its pants down. No shields, a handful of ships... and a moros... just sitting there. All part of a system shared by a small alliance with a handful of other stations, also in similar states of disarray.

In short we took everything, but being as it was that the moros could not be removed from the hole, we decided to put it to use, against the alliance who conveniently left it floating there for us. So we all zoomed over to the closest station and began breaking stuff for giggles.

Only two residents were logged in at the station.. both of whom were less than 6 months old and showed no signs of being alts. Hilarity ensued when they started asking in local if we were recruiting, followed shortly by bursts of rage and tears, then randomly switching to Space Balls quotes. At one point after all guns were incapped, one of them began on-lining a medium refining array.

Our corp mate Kwashi summed it up best when he said,

"Those guys we found in the pos reminded me of one of those post-apocalyptic movies where there are clueless vagrants living in the ruins of cities who have no idea how the cities once ran."

A sample of the local banter:

Vagrant Resident > well he left that dread here because get it out of the hole
Vagrant Resident > just like yall cant
Vagrant Resident > he couldnt
Us > Well, yes, it can't leave, so we had to take it to the nearest tower
Us > But I imagine you're aware of that
Vagrant Resident > yea we see it
Vagrant Resident > but soon yall will be out of ammo or the hole will close
Vagrant Resident > then yall will be stuck here with no ammo just drone
Vagrant Resident > drones*
Us > Lasers don't run out of ammo, and probes are reusable
Us> Really, you wouldn't be the first tower
Vagrant Resident > lasers have crystals and they burn out
Vagrant Resident > oh u talking the other tower in here?
Vagrant Resident > the one u took out that really didnt have anything there worth anything but the moros

We continued our bashing, with a small sliver of hope that perhaps the station was not stronted considering the state of the other station in system, but no such luck. After a brief discussion of whether or not we wanted to finish it off when it came out of reinforced we decided to call it a wrap -freshly exhausted from a POS destruction just two days before- we all just wanted to go home and count our profits.

And moros pay out juicy insurance.

New Eden Chronicles

As announced on CrazyKinux's Musings!

After a couple of weeks and some incredible submissions, CK and I have finally reached our final two to be cohosts with us on New Eden Chronicles! That's right! TWO! It's gonna be a partay up in here!!! There were so many awesome submissions, there was no way we could narrow it down to just one! And boy let me tell you, I was star struck by some of the people submitting auditions!

So without further ado, congratulations to

Ardwulf & Memoocan!!!

\o/

Can't wait to get this started, we've got lots of ideas just between CK and I! I can only imagine what our new partners in crime will bring to the table!

Stay tuned folks!

Adrielle Firewalker: Illustration

My first commissioned EVE portrait. Adrielle Firewalker for Kalahari Wayrest, I hope she likes.

I am taking additional commissions if you're interested, $100 or 1.5 B ISK. Includes a high quality poster print of your portrait. :)

EDIT: Changed some colors. "Superpants" was annoying.

More ISK than Brains?

Or really really smart?


2x Absolution
1x Anathema
2x Apocalypse
1x Apocalypse Navy Issue
2x Arazu
3x Armageddon
1x Astarte
2x Basilisk
2x Bestower
1x Bhaalgorn
1x Buzzard
7x Cerberus
3x Cheetah
4x Curse
1x Deimos
2x Drake
4x Falcon
1x Flycatcher
1x Heretic
2x Hound
1x Huginn
2x Hulk
1x Malediction
3x Manticore
2x Nighthawk
1x Occator
2x Pilgrim
5x Rapier
1x Raven
1x Retriever
4x Revelation
3x Rook
1x Sabre
2x Scimitar
1x Scorpion
1x Skiff
6x Sleipnir
1x Stiletto
1x Thanatos
6x Vagabond
1x Viator
1x Wolf
2x Zealot
1x Zephyr

These were all ships self destructed by our target last night.

After our hole briefly opened to a C6 hole we scanned down and eyeballed the local POS as we do, several tasty tempting things stood out to us. Juicy ships. Juicy ships and a big challenge. The potential for one hell of a pinata fest and one uber fight.


Much discussion was held before the decision was made that we were up for the challenge of taking on a corp with the potential fleet these guys had, and possibly winning and taking home some most epic toys. I mean if they had FIVE dreads and a carrier just floating in their bubble, we could only imagine what was in the hangars.

So we left our man in to gather intel, and carefully planned and plotted, and made our move. Like clockwork up went our POS, defensive wings assigned to locations, and a beefy fleet of bashers and reppers went to do its thang. Not a sign from the residents, but this didnt surprise us, their POS had gone into reinforced and they had time.


As we expected, they started logging on within 8 hours of the POS coming out of reinforcement.... we sent out an alert and our numbers spiked as well. We fully expected the fight of our lives. Bubbles up, tacklers in positions, someone positioned everywhere we could think to prevent them making a break to scan the hole out. You could taste the tension in the air as we watched more and more pilots appear, and maneuver to and launch some very intimidating ships.

There is no doubt in my mind if they had put those toys to use, they would have steamrolled us.

Then to our surprise, self destruct notifications started going off left and right. Were they bluffing? Was this some sort of insane wormhole life reverse psychology mind trick to distract us!?!?! ZOMG! But it didnt stop. Down to the last dread. With the exception of what they could load on to an orca and a carrier (and still blew up one carrier wtf?) and logged.


In the end we did get to pinata their hangar arrays and made off with some sweet rides, including two fully fitted Redeemers.


We figure their losses could have been as high as 50 billion isk worth of space stuff.

Knee jerk reaction is to think it was a cowardly move, to self destruct to either avoid the ego blow of having a kill loss.. or just deny us their toys.

But a deeper look is what is a very glaring flaw in EVE insurance payout system. Self destruction ensures they get insurance payouts for every single ship they themselves blow up. However, in a fight -and thats what this game is about, amiright??- if a pilot is podded in a wormhole with no way back in to reship, there is zero insurance payout for the ships we would have taken. So, technically they made quite a logical decision, as ass backwards as it is.

And now, I leave you with this moment of zen. Me and Embalizym with some hot ship on ship action.

Maeve Trinity : Illustration

So I've finally finished my illustration of Maeve. Figured I should finish it before the new avatars are implemented, and she deserved an homage of how she was. :)

She was done in pencil on illustration board, scanned, and painted/finished in Photoshop. I hope you all enjoy. And if there is interest, might consider commissions. :)

Oh... you can buy prints of this at deviantart here.